Me and my girls, monkeying around!
Tree photo by Mona Lisa Styles
Team Wildoney, my sweet dogs!
Lead: Fire & Windy,
Point: Ashley & Gabriel,
Wheel: Taffy & Lakota
photo by unknown newspaper photographer
Hermosa Beach, from the pier,
photo by me
Everyone I have ever gotten to know -- and as a very social person and a marriage & family therapist I have had the privilege of knowing many people quite well -- is a fascinating, one-of-a-kind mix of many things that seem consistent, along with some special things that surprise. I suppose I'm no different, and yet... Somehow, I feel that I have taken the suprising-mix-thing to an extreme, and it can be troubling. Or at least befuddling.
You see, I am a passionately eclectic person! I love and crave diversity, color, adventure, abundance, and texture in my life: past, present, and imagined future. I have no desire to fit in any single mold -- and yet, I desperately want to "fit in," to find a place to belong, to be understood and welcomed -- where friends warmly shout, "Norm!" (does that mean "normal?") when I walk into my real or virtual watering hole. I adore wearing every one of my many hats (and yet I sometimes feel a little identity-crisised). If forced to be constrained within a single, predictible channel, I imagine that I would feel angry-panicky and excrutiatingly bored! And yet I yearn with an intense angst for the many pieces of my life to feel cohesive, connected, coherent, or at least -- collected!
I do believe that having moved so much as a kid and in my 30's and early 40's explains a good deal of the discontinuity that disorients and dismays me. Certainly the divorce contributes. I believe that everyone needs and wants witnessing of their life -- to make it feel real and meaningful, and to help it all relate -- and so I struggle, because there are no witnesses to all of mine. We know ourselves at least partially through other's knowing of us. Moving as much as I have, dear friends have only been near for a few years at a time. Sometimes now I have a sensation of having begun to exist at the beginning of the most current chapter of my life, the one in which I moved back to California almost 6 years ago. Strange feeling.
Hence I am drawn to write this blog, so hopefully titled "Eclectic-Connected." I hope I can keep some of what I've been, even as I emphatically embrace all I am and all I hope to be. This is my attempt to write stories about...something that is me, that is my life, unique amongst the multitude of precious lives in this created universe!
I am a list maker, a taker of stock, a put-it-down on paper gal. So let me begin with who I am today:
a full-time, work-from-home Mom of two wonderful girls ages 12 and 14
a full-time PhD student in Marriage & Family Therapy (all-but-dissertation)
a really good cook
a half-time research scientist & author
a music lover who loves to sing
a therapist for victims of crime in the LA area
a sometime room-Mom, coach, PTO volunteer, party planner, and whatever else the kids need...
a wanna-be author of articles for popular journals (and books)
an on-again/off-again ebay seller and frequent ebay and thrift store shopper
an occasional university instructor of research methodologies and statistics
a very spiritual person
a demon for speed
a fiancee, in love with the most amazing and good man, planning a wedding in August
Here are some of the things I have been and done:
- a young kid whose parents were in graduate school, in Louisiana, Florida, and Texas
- a 10-year-old, tall and skinny kid who moved to California and grew up spending most of her time on the beach and in the ocean in Redondo Beach and Hermosa Beach, California
- an avid tree climber and book worm
- an athlete in cross country and track (I could run 10 miles in 80 minutes), and a high jumper (I could jump my own height: 5'9")
- an almost concert pianist (but I quit), a violin player
- a super devout Christian
- a librarian's assistant at UCLA
- a nanny in Beverly Hills, one summer
- an electrical engineer who helped to design super-secret communications systems
- an expert pitt crew for my bf's track, bicycle (road and velodrome), and triathlon racing
- an award-winning sled-dog racer, who showed and bred champion Siberian Huskies for 16 years, all over the USA and Canada
- a college math teacher of algebra and statistics
- an editor for the International Siberian Husky Club magazine
- a 200-mile-a-day commuter (Cincinnati, Ohio to Lexington, Kentucky) for 4 years, putting my ex thru medical school, working an engineering job that made me miserable
- an over-achieving pregnant woman/Mom in the rural outskirts of Cleveland for 4 years, solo parenting while dad did his 100-hour/week residency -- this was a really tough period of isolation and hard times
- a small-town "Doctor's Wife" in Hoquiam/Aberdeen, Washington (whose husband kept a mistress), solo parenting while going through that dark 5-year period of divorce, heartbreak, & rebirth
- a graduate student in Marriage & Family Therapy my last 2 years in Washington
- after a move to California, a clinician and doctoral student in Marriage & Family Therapy while living with my parents in Murrieta, CA for 4 years
- a budding party girl, when I had the time for it, with my awesome friends
- a month-long vacationer in Jackson Hole, Wyoming while my daughters learned to ski, and I fell in love with the most amazing man
- a renter, just my kids and me, and then adding my bf, in Winchester, California
- a happy returner to my hometown in Hermosa Beach, California a year ago!
OH, you know, there's always more, but that's about all she wrote this evening. :) See ya later, oh blog o' mine!